I moved to Chennai in 2004 for my first job right after completing MBA. Those were exciting times. I was getting a huge salary, living alone In a metro city with beaches, dating beautiful women and partying every weekend. On the work front, assignments were boring but easily manageable, boss was laid-back and colleagues were OK. So safe to say that I was buzzing my tits off.
Then one day, one of my college friends advised me to widen my network on LinkedIn. That seemed like an excellent suggestion as our college had a very strong alumni network and even today many alumni find new jobs through this old-boy network. So I started spending more time on LinkedIn. And gradually my upbeat mood started changing.
Whenever I saw posts from my MBA college batch mates changing jobs or going onsite, I started feeling jealous and insecure. People would post about a certification they had received and appreciation they got would make me wonder if I was putting enough efforts in my job. Even having less number of connections in my LinkedIn network than my colleagues stressed me out a bit.
It took me a couple of years to realize that spending too much time on LinkedIn and obsessing about others' professional journey was a bad idea. LinkedIn has its benefits, sure, but it's nuisance value was far greater. And ditto for other social media platforms widely used in India such as Facebook, WhatsApp, Instagram and X (formarly Twitter) .
Unlike LinkedIn, I enjoyed Facebook for a long time. Before Facebook, I was on Orkut for a very short time where I was blackmailed by my friends into writing too many testimonials. So moving to Facebook was a relief. I remember a lot of dating and farming (Farmville, anyone?) in my early days on Facebook. I would wake up in the morning and harvest my crops, flirt with women, sell the crops, buy farming equipment, go on dates in the evening and plant new seeds (in the farm only!) before going to sleep. It was nice. But around early 2010, two things happened which soured the FB experience.
First was a dramatic increase in sponsored content. I had absolutely no interest in politics, religion and social issues but still I started getting a lot of hateful content on those. After opening Facebook, instead of getting TMI but harmless status updates from my friends such as ‘right now having the worst case of diarrhoea’, I started getting some really problematic content from internet trolls. Which was disturbing. And second was my parents' generation discovering Facebook. They all joined en masse around the same time and started leaving embarrassing comments on our photos. That pulled Facebook's coolness quotient way down.
The first time when somebody asked me to download WhatsApp, I was puzzled.
Me: Why do I need WhatsApp?
My friend: So that we can message each other
Me: We have messaging app for that
My friend: Yeah but this is lot more colourful
Me: That is not a good enough reason
My friend: But everybody is on the platform and you eventually will have to join
Me: I am not that weak willed. Mark my words …You will never see me on WhatsApp.
Couple of days later, the girl I was dating at that time told me that she would be sending me some spicy pictures on WhatsApp and before she reached the end of that sentence, WhatsApp got installed on my phone. So much for my strong will!
Anyhoo… pretty soon I discovered there is such a thing called WhatsApp Groups where multiple people can interact with each other simultaneously. I found that idea utterly revolting but still within a few days, I got added to my family, society and school WhatsApp groups. Big mistake. It was bad enough to wake up to multiple flowery ‘Good Morning’ messages. But I could have certainly done without the hateful propaganda forwards throughout the day. And there was no point in countering that propaganda as by the time you are done dealing with 1 forward, 10 new forwards would land in your inbox. I had no idea that the uncles I had considered mildly unpleasant earlier were actually prize assholes.
I joined Instagram because Facebook was no longer cool and younger people made fun of you for still having a FB account. For the first few weeks, all I saw was hundreds of baby pictures shared by my friends. A few of them shared travel and wedding pictures. All in all, Instagram seemed like a harmless social media platform for sharing photos. Then I discovered Reels. It is like a bacteria specifically designed to rot your brain.
First, anybody can make reels. You don't need any particular talent and Instagram provides all sorts of templates. Which is why there is so much cringe content from talentless folks on reels. Second, because most reels are between 15 to 30 seconds, it's easy to waste your time doom-scrolling for hours. Third, once you like something, the algorithm will keep on providing you the same thing over and over again whether you want it or not. And finally, once you get used to consuming short form content, consuming genuinely good long form content becomes very difficult.
X
Now with all the earlier social media platforms, at least in the beginning, things were peaceful and pleasant. But in the case of X, I think from day 1 people are using it to fight with each other. Even back in 2010 when I first started using Twitter, people did their very best to inject as much venom as possible in 140 words. X is like a dumpster fire but on a global level.
Social Media Rationing
I realised that my social media consumption, though very pleasant in the short term, was causing me a lot of long term problems. Constant comparison with others was giving me anxiety, doom-scrolling for hours was causing sleep disruption, consumption of short term content reduced my attention span and countering misinformation led to fights with my family members. And eventually I decided enough is enough.
Now, I was clear that I will not completely stop using social media platforms. It is useful in so many ways. Facebook is great for keeping in touch with friends and relatives you don't want to keep in touch with. Wish them happy birthday and like their photos on Facebook once in a while and you don't have to have any real conversation with them ever while still maintaining the facade of relationship. As for WhatsApp, I have been able to buy many Hindi old comics after joining comic related WhatsApp groups. I use Instagram to organise my travel photos. The fact that they make my friends jealous is just a happy coincidence. My consumer complaints get quickly resolved when I raise them on X.
So I stayed on the social media platforms but limited my time spent there. I have set aside one hour for all social media interaction like responding to people on Facebook, Instagram, X and Reddit. Usually that is 10:00 a.m. to 11:00 a.m. If I receive any social media messages after that then I can respond to those the next day only in that same time slot. I have exited all toxic WhatsApp groups and now part of only those hobbies based groups where moderators do not allow any problematic content. Since I have retired, I have no further use of LinkedIn and that is a big relief. Just like a smoking addict trying to quit by replacing cigarettes with something less harmful, I started watching more OTT content instead of spending time on social media platforms. Passive consumption has become the key for me rather than active participation. All this was not easy but as a 1980 born, I had lived 20 years without the internet so I knew it was doable.
In conclusion, while social media is great for memes, stalking your ex and watching dogs wear sunglasses, too much of it can turn your brain into digital mashed potatoes. Scrolling endlessly might feel like productivity’s distant cousin, but it usually just leaves you drained, distracted and somehow convinced that everyone else has their life perfectly together (they don’t). By putting down the phone and stepping into real life, you make room for actual joy, deeper focus and maybe even a hobby that doesn’t involve filters. Now I don't know what is your relationship with social media but I will say this… limit the scroll, reclaim your soul and remember: the only thing that should be endless is your curiosity and not your feed.
Watch the social dilema on Netflix.